Monday, May 25, 2015

Fundraising Update + Giveaway

Hey everyone!  I am just sitting at my favorite coffee shop, Lux, right now thinking about last night's going away party.  Thank you so much everyone who was able to make it out.  I am so grateful for my community here in Phoenix.  You guys have supported me, believed in me, prayed for me, and paid for my missions endeavors, even during absences of years at a time.  It is a rare thing and I am incredibly privileged to have such good friends.

Just a little update about India: I am leaving Phoenix June 1st and heading to Georgia where I will be living at AIM headquarters, assembling a team, training, and planning for the work in India.  I plan to launch to India in January.  I have already begun working on hammering out the vision and mission, brainstorming with AIM and ICM leadership, and setting up lines of communication.  Currently our vision is to take ownership of a district within the state of Andhra Pradesh called Nalgonda.  What we don't want to happen is for our contacts in India that we are going to serve to spend more time telling us what to do and how to do it than they do running their own ministry.  Our solution is to take ownership of this district using their vision and strategies.  It is a massive challenge and full of potential.  I know that God is already at work there preparing the hearts of the people and I am excited to get going!

 In order to maximize the organization's resources and put as much of their money toward direct ministry in India, I will be responsible for raising my own living expenses from my own network of family and friends.  The total cost of my time in Georgia will be around $6000 and after that my goal is to have a base of monthly support around $1000.  This should cover flights back to the States a couple times a year as well as my everyday expenses while I am doing full time ministry.

I have two paintings that I am giving away to whomever pledges the largest monthly donation.  The largest pledge by this Friday the 29th at midnight will get their choice of two acrylic on canvas pieces.

This one is a portrait of a young street girl that I met in Kolkata.  It is gigantic.  4' by 3'


This one is a representation of my experience in Kolkata.  A crow sitting in a garbage dump, beautiful and desperate at the same time.  It is medium size 18" by 24"


My hope is that I have a core of people who feel a connection with India and the people there, who are invested in a small way to reaching the "ends of the world".  So please consider this partnership prayerfully.  I would much rather have small donations of $10 or $15 a month that stay consistent and involved than large contributions that are unsustainable.  Also smaller donations mean more people are connected and representing the church in the US to the people of Andhra Pradesh.  Thank you so much for reading this blog!

Here is the link to set up a monthly donation.  It is through AIM so it is tax deductible.

For more information about what I'm doing in India and why I'm going there please read my previous blog.  I will be using this blog to report the work in India and to stay in touch with everyone in the States so if you want please subscribe so updates will be sent to your email.  Thanks again!

-Brant 

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Dating, Breakups, and Why?


I've felt a little at odds with God lately.  I liked a girl for a year.  I waited for the right time.  Finally the time came and she said yes.  We dated for two months and then it ended abruptly.  And now, many weeks later, I'm sitting in a lonely chair processing the breakup and I have found myself asking a couple of questions over and over.  "Why did this happen?"  And "what did I do wrong?"  Throughout the relationship, I always reminded myself that if I just followed Jesus everything would be ok; if I just loved like Jesus the details would work out.  I genuinely believed that.  Well everything did not work out.  I felt like God abandoned me, or maybe He never listened in the first place.  "I followed you God, I loved like you, I pursued you and everything went to hell."  It seemed like God lured me into a trap.  Either that or life has no meaning and I am just a delusional trying to convince myself that God knows who I am. 

I was forgetting that God never made that promise.  He never said if I followed him everything would be ok.  He never said that relationships would all make sense and work out if I just loved as well as He did.  God commanded us to do those things despite the results, and have faith in Him that it is for the best even when it doesn't work out.  The beginning of the book of James comes to mind, "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."  James doesn't say "if you follow Jesus then you won't have to go through hard stuff" or "Make sure you figure out what you did wrong when everything seems to be falling apart."  He says when you meet various trials just know that it's a good thing in the end.  It's actually surprisingly encouraging to me right now to know that hardships and suffering are just as much a part of the life of a Christian as of anyone else.  Hard times in life come and go and just because you are going through something difficult doesn't mean God has abandoned you or you were acting outside his will. 

The book of Job has been my greatest source of comfort the last month.  Job was a great guy who loved God and was blessed tremendously with family, friends, and good business; then one day for no apparent reason everything was taken from him.  Job went from praising God for all the ways He had blessed him, to cursing the day he was born.  As he struggles to find meaning in all of it and wrestles through serious doubts about God and the purpose of following Him, I feel better about my own situation and circumstances.  God didn't provide a magical fix to all life's pain, but he gave us people to relate to when we are going through it and He tells us that even when it becomes literally impossible to find the meaning in the suffering that there is indeed meaning; but His plans are bigger than our vision and comprehension.   The tests of life aren't symptoms of something going wrong, they are bringing perfection and completion.

So I guess in the end I am finding meaning and encouragement after all.  Even sitting in an armchair in my bare-walled bachelor pad, processing a breakup in dramatic self-absorption, I find that God's words bring healing and inspiration and even now in my blinded condition I am a little better able to understand God and life.  So don't be like me and get mad at God if you don't understand the why and don't conclude that you are outside his will if things aren't working; but be encouraged, God doesn’t cause all things to happen but He does cause what does happen to work together for good for those who love God because neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor breakups, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Friday, November 14, 2014

Why I No Longer Believe in the Apocalypse, the Rapture, or the Anti-christ

    This is a blog about why I have abandoned my previously held beliefs regarding the Anti-Christ, the rapture, and the end of the world.  I explain it through personal experience, statistics, and scripture.  Buckle up, this blog is a lot longer than most of my blogs (it takes 15 minutes to read, I timed it) and will probably prove quite shocking to some of you.  

    My eschatological beliefs were founded long before I ever heard the word eschatology (the study of the "end times").  Like most churched Americans of my generation I was raised with the typical Left Behind-ish teachings that the world was getting worse and worse and that as Jesus predicted, it was going to be totally uninhabitable for true Christians pretty soon.  In fact, Jesus was going to return at any time and rapture the few people who didn't have the mark of the beast and then God would pour out his wrath on the world until it was totally destroyed.  I didn't know it then, but this view of our future is referred to by theologians as the "dispensationalist" view, which is a "futurist" interpretation of the Bible.  

    Those beliefs were first shaken my sophomore year of college  in my mandatory Bible class.  Our first assignment was to sit down and read the book of Matthew.  That was it.  Sit down and read the book of Matthew.  Then we had to write a couple paragraphs on what we thought the point of the book was.  Those 2 hours changed my whole life.  Surprisingly, I didn't find that Matthew was about anything I had learned in church.  It wasn't about heaven and hell, it wasn't about going to church, it wasn't about avoiding the mark of the beast, and Jesus never even mentioned the sinner's prayer!  Oddly enough, the book appeared to be about the "Kingdom of God."  I didn't really know what it meant at the time but I knew that I had been missing something really big.  I didn't think to dismiss what I had been taught about the end times, but I figured it just must not have been as important as I once thought.

    The last two years I have spent travelling the world trying to be a part of this so-called Kingdom.  I quit my job, sold all my possessions, and started working with random missionaries and pastors in other countries.  I saw literal miracles happen before my eyes, I saw huge groups of people dedicate themselves to God, I saw lives transformed by love, broken people made whole, and I saw God doing really big things all over the world.  My eschatological views were being tested even more and I still hadn't even heard the word.  Later though, I would look back and start to ask some really big questions.  If the world is ending soon are the things that I'm seeing God do around the globe fruitless?  It doesn't seem like everything is getting worse and worse, in fact, it appears to be getting better and better.  Every time I meet someone touched by God, I see them causing this unstoppable domino effect of love, change, and life.  If this keeps up, Jesus is going to have to rapture the whole earth! 

    In fact, it wasn't a product of my imagination, let me take a moment to share some shocking statistics with you.

  1. The Church is growing at a faster rate than ever before - including the first 500 years when it went from 12 people to the entire Roman empire
  2. Over 200,000 people are now becoming born-again Christians every day
  3. In 100 years Africa has gone from 9% to 45% Christian
  4. In 50 years China has gone from a couple million to over 50 million Christians
  5. In the last 2000 years the percent of humanity enslaved has reduced from 16% to 0.4% 
  6. Countries among the most impoverished in the world will see acute poverty eradicated within 20 years if they continue at present rates

  7. The remnants of my faith in the Left-Behind theology were destroyed at a missions school in Spain last year.  We started studying the story of the Bible.  (spoiler alert for those who haven't read it) The central  theme of the book is about Jesus.  It starts out with God creating this fantastic world and then suddenly it seems to get ruined by the free will of Adam and Eve.  Right away God promises that he will one day send someone who will redeem everything and bring it back to its original condition.  He picks some people who will eventually produce this character, the anticipation builds, and then finally one day it happens and surprise! It's God himself!  He sets up his Kingdom and plants the seed of redemption.  The end.  Guess what?  God's plan worked.  Jesus was able to defeat the devil, conquer sin,  and rule earth from the right hand of the throne of God.  God never failed and He never will.  He always wins. 

  8. "The scepter shall not depart from Judah, nor the ruler's staff from between his feet, until he comes to whom it belongs; and to him shall be the obedience of the nations." Gen 49:1 (Jacob speaking of Jesus)
  9.  "I will raise up your offspring after you, who shall come from your body, and I will establish his kingdom forever" 2 Sam 7:12 (God speaking to David)
  10.  "And of the increase of His kingdom and peace there will be no end" Isaiah 9:7  (God's prophecy about Jesus)
  11.  "I will build my church and the gates of Hell will not prevail against it" Matthew 16:18 (Jesus speaking to Peter)
  12. "He raised Him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places, far above all rule and authority and power and dominion, and above every name that is named, not only in this age but also in the one to come. And he put all things under his feet and gave him as head over all things to the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills all in all." Eph 1:20-23 

  13. To me, this sounds very hopeful.  It sounds like Satan lost and the church/Kingdom of God is victorious.  Jesus crushed Satan, conquered death, established his church, and now sits at the right hand of God ruling the earth!  Pretty good news huh? 

    So then why were you taught the bad news that the church is going to fail and Jesus will have to come rescue it from Satan's clutches and destroy the earth?  Well, there are only a few passages that dispensationists use to support their doctrine.  These are prophecies from Daniel 2 and 9, Matthew 24-25, and some chapters of Revelation that, in my opinion, were not interpreted literally enough.  Unfortunately, this is a blog, not a book, and I don't have space to post the specifics of every dispensationalist interpretation error, so let me give you just a few facts about dispensationalism and then I'll explain just one passage (arguably the most relevant one) from Jesus' teachings.

  14. Dispensationalism/futurism was invented in 1909 for the Schofield Reference Bible and has only risen to popularity within the last 60 years
  15. The fundamental view that the church will rise in victory and power before the return of Jesus (called the partial preterist view - the opposing interpretation to dispensationalism) has been the predominant view for the past 2,000 years; from Augustine to John Calvin and Martin Luther to Charles Spurgeon and George Muller. 
  16. "The Anti-christ" is never mentioned in Revelation, or Daniel, or Matthew; only in 1 John (which had the same author as Revelation by the way) and each of the 4 references specifically says that he was alive at the time the book was written.
  17. The Rapture is never mentioned in the Bible
  18. The "great tribulation" is only mentioned in a couple verses and refers to the destruction of Jerusalem
  19. Each time the "end times" or "end of the age" is mentioned in the New Testament it is accompanied by a declaration that the author was currently living in the end times (so maybe they weren't referring to the end of the world but something different...) 
  20. When Jesus talked about the end of the age, Jewish persecution, and the destruction of the Temple he clearly stated all this would take place within one generation which is definitively supported by historical events in 70 AD

  21. Most of the theories regarding the great tribulation (and dispensationalism in general) are taken from Matthew 24:1-34:

    "Jesus left the temple and was going away, when his disciples came to point out to him the buildings of the temple. But he answered them, “You see all these, do you not? Truly, I say to you, there will not be left here one stone upon another that will not be thrown down.”  As he sat on the Mount of Olives, the disciples came to him privately, saying, “Tell us, when will these things be, and what will be the sign of your coming and of the end of the age?” And Jesus answered them, “See that no one leads you astray. For many will come in my name, saying, ‘I am the Christ,’ and they will lead many astray. And you will hear of wars and rumors of wars. See that you are not alarmed, for this must take place, but the end is not yet. For nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom, and there will be famines and earthquakes in various places. All these are but the beginning of the birth pains.  Then they will deliver you up to tribulation and put you to death, and you will be hated by all nations for my name's sake. And then many will fall away and betray one another and hate one another. And many false prophets will arise and lead many astray. And because lawlessness will be increased, the love of many will grow cold. But the one who endures to the end will be saved. And this gospel of the kingdom will be proclaimed throughout the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come.  So when you see the abomination of desolation spoken of by the prophet Daniel, standing in the holy place (let the reader understand), then let those who are in Judea flee to the mountains. Let the one who is on the housetop not go down to take what is in his house, and let the one who is in the field not turn back to take his cloak. And alas for women who are pregnant and for those who are nursing infants in those days! Pray that your flight may not be in winter or on a Sabbath. For then there will be great tribulation, such as has not been from the beginning of the world until now, no, and never will be. And if those days had not been cut short, no human being would be saved. But for the sake of the elect those days will be cut short. Then if anyone says to you, ‘Look, here is the Christ!’ or ‘There he is!’ do not believe it. For false christs and false prophets will arise and perform great signs and wonders, so as to lead astray, if possible, even the elect. See, I have told you beforehand. So, if they say to you, ‘Look, he is in the wilderness,’ do not go out. If they say, ‘Look, he is in the inner rooms,’ do not believe it. For as the lightning comes from the east and shines as far as the west, so will be the coming of the Son of Man. Wherever the corpse is, there the vultures will gather.  Immediately after the tribulation of those days the sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give its light, and the stars will fall from heaven, and the powers of the heavens will be shaken. Then will appear in heaven the sign of the Son of Man, and then all the tribes of the land will mourn, and they will see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of heaven with power and great glory. And he will send out his angels with a loud trumpet call, and they will gather his elect from the four winds, from one end of heaven to the other.  From the fig tree learn its lesson: as soon as its branch becomes tender and puts out its leaves, you know that summer is near. So also, when you see all these things, you know that he is near, at the very gates. Truly, I say to you, this generation will not pass away until all these things take place. "

    What were the disciples asking about when they said, "When will these things take place?"  They were asking about the destruction of the Temple.  Jesus is predicting the destruction of the Temple and actually all of Jerusalem here, which had already been prophesied many times in the Old Testament.  This happened within one generation just as Jesus prophesied.  Within 40 years after Jesus
    declared judgment, 20,000 Roman soldiers, under the command of General Titus, surrounded the city and cut off all supplies of food for four months so the people would starve. Then the soldiers came into the city and mercilessly killed more than one million Jews. The soldiers set the Temple on fire and led away 97,000 Jews as captives. At that time the Jewish population was decimated. Historically, little is known about the Jews’ lives for the following 60 years. It was not until A.D. 130-135 that they began reassembling with enough strength to attempt one last rebellion against Rome. Then after three years of battling, the Romans were able to crush that rebellion killing 580,000 Jews, and Israel no more was recognized as a nation (until 1948). It also was at that time that the Roman commander ordered the Temple in Jerusalem to be demolished so completely that each and every stone was carried away and the land upon which the Temple had stood was plowed over completely. The Temple was destroyed totally, as Jesus said it would be.  A detailed description by a non-Christian Jew who was there at the time (Josephus) still exists.  He describes mothers cooking and eating their own children, murders over crumbs of bread, the defilement of the survivors by the Romans, and in general horrific inhumane acts such as the world has not experienced before or since. This interpretation of the passage becomes obvious if we compare this passage with its parallel passage in Luke 21 (Luke was writing to a more gentile audience who wouldn't have had as much knowledge of the scriptural prophecies in the Old Testament)

     And while some were speaking of the temple, how it was adorned with noble stones and offerings, he said, “As for these things that you see, the days will come when there will not be left here one stone upon another that will not be thrown down.” And they asked him, “Teacher, when will these things be, and what will be the sign when these things are about to take place?” And he said, “See that you are not led astray. For many will come in my name, saying, ‘I am he!’ and, ‘The time is at hand!’ Do not go after them. And when you hear of wars and tumults, do not be terrified, for these things must first take place, but the end will not be at once.  Then he said to them, “Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom.  There will be great earthquakes, and in various places famines and pestilences. And there will be terrors and great signs from heaven.  But before all this they will lay their hands on you and persecute you, delivering you up to the synagogues and prisons, and you will be brought before kings and governors for my name's sake. This will be your opportunity to bear witness. Settle it therefore in your minds not to meditate beforehand how to answer, for I will give you a mouth and wisdom, which none of your adversaries will be able to withstand or contradict. You will be delivered up even by parents and brothers and relatives and friends, and some of you they will put to death. You will be hated by all for my name's sake. But not a hair of your head will perish. By your endurance you will gain your lives. But when you see Jerusalem surrounded by armies, then know that its desolation has come near. Then let those who are in Judea flee to the mountains, and let those who are inside the city depart, and let not those who are out in the country enter it, for these are days of vengeance, to fulfill all that is written. Alas for women who are pregnant and for those who are nursing infants in those days! For there will be great distress upon the earth and wrath against this people. They will fall by the edge of the sword and be led captive among all nations, and Jerusalem will be trampled underfoot by the Gentiles, until the times of the Gentiles are fulfilled.  And there will be signs in sun and moon and stars, and on the earth distress of nations in perplexity because of the roaring of the sea and the waves, people fainting with fear and with foreboding of what is coming on the world. For the powers of the heavens will be shaken. And then they will see the Son of Man coming in a cloud with power and great glory. Now when these things begin to take place, straighten up and raise your heads, because your redemption is drawing near. And he told them a parable: "Look at the fig tree, and all the trees. As soon as they come out in leaf, you see for yourselves and know that the summer is already near. So also, when you see these things taking place, you know that the kingdom of God is near. Truly, I say to you, this generation will not pass away until all has taken place."

    One more thing I would like to point out about this passage is that Jesus later said nobody knew when He was coming back, not even the angels, not even himself!  He made this point very clear by sharing 6 parables about how when he returns there will be no signs, like a thief in the night.  So obviously, these signs are not about Jesus' second coming but about the destruction of Jerusalem. 

     In summary, the reasons I switched from dispensationalism to partial preterism are my personal experience of a world growing closer to God, statistical evidence, and a more literal interpretation of eschatological prophecies in the Bible.  I don't expect this blog to completely change your mind, no doubt it raised more questions than it answered, but I do hope that it has sparked some interest and made you question some things. That being said, I still hold the conviction that eschatology is not as important as a lot of American Christians make it out to be.  Jesus, and the Bible in general, just doesn't talk much about it.  There are many things more important than our eschatological convictions, one of which is unity of the body of Christ; however, I believe it is worth bringing up because there is a lot of potential for hope in this area that many people have lost, and hope is the foundation of our faith and the Gospel.  If you would like to pursue the matter further I would highly recommend reading "Victorious Eschatology" by Harold Eberle and Martin Trench who go through each passage of scripture and topic of interest individually. 

Sunday, October 26, 2014

My Plans for the Future

Right now I'm all pumped up!  I just got back from a church service at New City.  Church is one of those things that you don't realize how much you miss when it's gone until you come back again.  It's like having access to a giant safe of cash that you can go to whenever you want and take whatever you need.  Plus they have unlimited coffee from Lux in the foyer.  Anyway, I'm not writing this blog about church, I am writing to announce my future plans. 

I am flying to Ohio on Tuesday to welcome my new nephew into the world where I will stay for two weeks.  Then on the 13th of November I am flying back to Phoenix to stay for an undetermined length of time.  What will I be doing in Phoenix?  I plan to sell my house, work a job, get reacquainted with the community, and maybe even do a little bit of medical training as well as serving the homeless in downtown Phoenix.  I love this city and I am excited to extend my visit! 

As with every aspect and nuance of life, it is important to ask yourself "why?"  Why am I staying in Phoenix?  I am staying here to prepare for my next big adventure, whatever that may be; I am staying here to maintain relationships that are very important to me; I am staying here to love other people and look for ways to take part in the big plans that God has for this city. 

So if you live in Arizona hit me up and let's hang out!  And if you know of any job opportunities let me know.  Thanks everyone for reading even when I am doing boring stuff! 


-Brant 

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

What Did I Learn in India?

“What was the biggest lesson you learned in India? How did you grow the most?” These are questions I have been asked since arriving back in the States after spending half a year working in Kolkata slums with impoverished and destitute out-castes. I suppose I probably grew more and learned more about myself than I will ever know, but to me these questions appear to miss the point. I didn’t go to India to learn a lesson and I didn’t go to grow in my faith. I went to India to help those less fortunate than myself.
I went to Kolkata because a lot of poor people live in Kolkata. Though I was hoping, of course, that Kolkata would be the next step in my life and faith and bring greater intimacy with God, that wasn’t really the goal; the goal was to look after some sick people and visit some lonely people, to be the hands and feet of Jesus in a land that could use some extra hands and feet. These questions seemed to be taking the emphasis off of them and placing it on me. Though it felt a little annoying at first, responding to the question, “How did you grow?” actually helped me process my experiences and in doing so I have realized once again the beauty of the G42 phrase “both and”. Yes I went to India to love Indians, but I also went to seek the heart of God. In the Kingdom these are not mutually exclusive but entirely inseparable. The point was to love others and the point was to learn and grow; and yes, I did learn incredibly valuable lessons. Not the least of which was this one.



Thursday, October 2, 2014

DHMH 2014: Yellowstone

Hundreds of miles from the nearest civilization stand four naked men.  Behind them rises an epic eleven thousand foot mountain and in front stretches a crystal clear lake surrounded by tall alpine trees.  Overhead is a picturesque unadulterated blue sky dotted with a few white clouds and at their bare feet a small pool of steaming water bubbles.  The long haired man looks at his watch and exclaims, “it’s about to blow!”  Suddenly the geyser erupts, expulsing huge jets of boiling water high into the air while the men jump up and down at its base yelling at the top of their lungs.  Welcome to the sixth and a half annual Dan Hoffman Memorial Hike of Yellowstone National Park. 

I had travelled for a couple weeks from India to be there, but preparation for this moment began eight months earlier when I was making decisions about when and how long I was going to stay in India. Everything must be planned around the DHMH.  Almost every year somebody has to do something as drastic as quitting a job or leaving a country in order to make it.  Waking up in the bed of Ryan’s truck after our late arrival into camp the previous night and hearing the laughter of my best friends as they sipped steaming coffee in the cold morning air made it all worth it. 

“That means you cannot be on each other’s campsites. Not to sleep and not even for dinner.” sneered the old lady in the backcountry permit office as she started the cheesiest bear-awareness video ever created.  I exchanged looks with Dan.  As usual, many rules would be broken on the DHMH.  Sometimes I think if park rangers had their way visitors wouldn’t even be allowed in the park. 

I pried off my boots and peeled away the sticky socks underneath before I even sat down.  A refreshing breeze cooled my blistered toes as I dropped my heavy pack and slid into the sand, pushing them through the pebbles.  It was well into the first day and after seven miles of hiking we had finally reached Heart Lake, an oasis as still as a photograph and teeming with trout.  It didn’t take long for me to drift off to sleep in the afternoon sun as I waited for the others to catch up.  This is the life. 

I shielded my sunburned eyes as I scanned the distant horizon.  Thirty miles to the south towered the Grand Teton mountain range, the only thing I could see that appeared higher than me.  It was the second day and I was standing on the peak of Mt Sheridan, gasping in the thin air and perspiring from the challenging climb but triumphant in my accomplishment.  Only one of us ended up with serious altitude sickness and surprisingly, despite everything India had thrown at me, it wasn’t me.  I watched a hawk soar down below along the cliffs above the snow fields and felt that he should be envious of my freedom. 



A bright white skull lay just under the surface, grinning up at me eerily.  It was surrounded by hundreds of other animal bones at the bottom of the geyser.  The water was a tropical blue and as clear as glass.  White and yellow mineral deposits contrasted sharply around its edge and a thick stream of vapors and steam drifted up from its smooth surface.  I dipped my pinky finger quickly and jerked it back out even faster.  So hot.  My little off-trail excursion had paid off; there are only a few places on the planet where these exist and here I had one all to myself.  Off in the distance I saw some more steam; one of these geysers was about to blow!


Standing naked at the edge of a geyser as it erupts and looking up at the vast quantity of boiling water coming right for you is a unique experience not soon forgotten.  It’s this kind of adventure that makes campfire instant meals the most delicious and nourishing delight ever tasted.  It’s these types of experiences that cement friendships and produce deep, life-changing conversations.  It’s these moments and relationships that money can’t buy that keep us coming year after year regardless of lower priorities.  The sixth and a half annual Dan Hoffman Memorial Hike of Yellowstone National Park: another epic success.  

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Back in the States...Again


I walked across the padded carpet to the passport control queue where a rude overweight woman with a name tag was impatiently instructing passengers. Facing out past the cleanly divided lines was a big-screen TV playing a live American Football game and overhead a giant red, white and blue flag hung vertically. The officer looked at my immigration card. In the space for countries visited was my long list of tiny words, “Norway, England, France, Spain, Morocco, Gibraltar, Switzerland, India, Thailand, Hong Kong.” “How long have you been gone?” he asked in American English. “Nine months” I said. “And you went to all these countries? Wow. Well welcome back.” I took my stamped passport, stepped across the line, and I was home.

A couple of hours later I stood on the side of a highway strumming a banjo. I had repaired flip-flops, Indian baggy pants, and a blue tank on. My hair was a matted mess and my eyes were bloodshot from the jet lag. On the drive from the airport my friend’s car had had a flat tire and now we were waiting for a random guy who had stopped to help to get back with a tire-iron. A vehicle slowed down to ask if we were ok but the two old ladies seemed hesitant to even roll down their window once they caught sight of me. I gave them an Indian head bob without thinking. The US is an odd place. It feels vacant, like just a few rich people have a whole giant country all to themselves. Nobody walks on the sidewalks, nobody sells anything on the streets, and apparently nobody drives on the highways. Two hours in and I already felt lonely and directionless. At least I have enough experience with reverse culture shock to identify its effects, though I still feel powerless to avoid them.

It helps me to read my journal entries from the last time I came back to the States after a year abroad. I found this poem that I had written on my flight to JFK after the World Race.

Confused and sweaty I exited the airliner
My hat was sinking over my eyes but my hands were too full to fix it
Where had I just been?
Maybe an easier question is where haven't I been?
I felt a cold trying to make its way down my esophagus
Like I needed a hot tea
Or ice cream
Or emergen-C
What does the word "denial" even mean?
Psychologically speaking that is
Can one deny the fact that he is in denial?
Why do I feel like that guy in Office Space,
Who made a million dollars
Because he got destroyed by oncoming traffic
My backpack was digging into my shoulders
So I took it off
I just slipped my arms out and laid it on the floor
I could walk away from it if I wanted
But my laptop is in there
And my earbuds
And my wallet
It's not that I don't want to be home
It's not that I don't want the trip to be over
I just don't understand who I have become
Not just yet
I muddled up my vision and put on boots one size too big
And now I don't have a choice but to run this way
To exit the airplane
To go through customs
Sure that I have something to declare
But not quite sure exactly what it is


Thank you everyone who supported me and read my blogs while I was in India! I do not have a definite plan for the next stage of life but will update everyone when it comes. The next couple weeks I plan to be in OH, TN, KS, Denver, and AZ so send me a message if you want to catch up.

-Brant